How many times do you tell your story, and someone will go, “I know just how you feel”, or some other reply that has you saying in your darling head, “You have NO IDEA”? They also will have all sorts of advice and suggestions and know JUST how to fix your issues, yesterday.
I hear you, however may not REALLY understand you. Allow me to try, to learn, for No one really understands another’s journey…
No one really understands another’s journey…
We have our interpretation of it according to our own personal experience, however there are SO many factors that make my experience and your experience with a certain person, situation, accident, trauma, disease, illness, husband, wife, child, parent etc so different, yet seem the same.
Even siblings will have a totally different perspective from each other, different reactions, responses and outcomes to interactions with others, situations, trauma & illness.
Yes similar experiences does give fellow feeling/empathy, and there will be tips and tools that one can share that may assist another, may resonate with another, ….. or they may NOT.
None of us live with the same person, have the same job, friends, families, upbringings etc so our experience will be vastly different, just as is the way we view the world and how we respond or react to what is happening in the world we view.
I do my best to have compassion for others, to be empathetic, supportive, empowering and inspiring…yet I know often I just do not get it.
It is not until we have come to a place of similar situations to understand ourselves, what is happening to us, how our reactions to situations and life and how other people are impacting what is happening to us that we can understand what another was trying to share with us.
I can remember many years ago in the depth of depression sobbing down the phone to someone, and them telling me, “Erena, YOU are the only one who can decide when you wake up in the morning whether you are going to have a good day or a bad one”! Well, I did not think I could cry any harder, however I did – she did not understand – she did not care….so I thought.
Yet it was not many years later, lots of lessons later and greater understanding and compassion for myself and others, I knew EXACTLY what she meant! It was my perception of myself, my situation and my surroundings that was key to this change. My situation, surroundings are not that much different, yet I AM SO DIFFERENT, and how I live my life is DIFFERENT.
Now I too share that same information with my clients, however in a much more gentle way with examples of how we can do this, and it will take some practice to master – especially if we have been practicing a depressing negative way of living and outlook for some time.
The key experiences I have some understandings of and have worked through to turn my life around are abuse, bullying, depression, unhealthy abusive relationships, over-weight, allergies and chronic pain of muscles.
So YES I do hear you, and do my best to understand your situation. I think the key to the work I do is when you can share, I can glean a better understanding and help you find a different perspective than the one that has gotten you into this situation. Changing perception is key to everything that you wish your life could be. When things are not working the way you think it should be, just changing our perception can bring the biggest transformation.
So what are biggest differences for me now in my life?
- I can be in the middle of a storm (being verbally or emotionally abused and feel secure and safe. (I may not feel confident or unhurt in the moment, but I know I am okay)
- Excess weight is releasing so I am becoming lighter
- I am much less likely to be abused or feel threatened
- I am certainly happier, have a greater measure of self respect and am able to respect others more.
- I no longer have pain (suffered for 4 years)
- The alleriges of my childhood through to early 30’s have all gone
- I have no issues with my past and am grateful for my experiences from the perspective I have value to offer others who wish to break free of their pasts.
- I have rediscovered joy and the wonder life.
If you would like to work on your life, to move forward, to discover where you could be and transform your life…take action now – book your 15 minute free consult for 2017 and start the year as you want – start the year with the first step toward your potential.